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When Lara was a child, her father met with a business associate at their home. It was here, behind this associate in their living room, that she first saw "him." He was surrounded by an intense bright light. When looking at this silhouette, Lara became overwehelmed by a sense of pure horror, and was convinced that her father's associate would die later that very day. The associate suffered a coronary that afternoon.
Following her numerous sitings, Lara believed that it was normal to see beings this way. Her mother took her to see Father Esposito, who said if she kept "seeing things," she would have to become a nun. She decided against it. (MM: "Midnight of the Century")
Although Lara believed he should have been a comfort, his appearances would continue to frighten her, as they would be a portent of evil. (MM: "Monster") As time passed, each appearance became more intense. (MM: "Midnight of the Century")
After Lara saw him, she, in addition to being terrified, would have heightened senses, an uncluttered mind, and would feel unstoppable. Despite this, she hated him and wished to have a normal life. (MM: "Midnight of the Century")
Despite the fact that she stated to "believe in him," Lara would occasionally have her doubts. In March 1998, Lara went to the John Hopkins School of Medicine university library to study the book Physiological Causes and Psychological Effects of Religious Hallucinations believing that he might actually not be real. The idea of being relieved of her visions of him was one of the temptations to Lara Means by Owl Gordon Johnston. (MM: "Owls")
Some time shortly afterward, he stopped appearing to Lara. Despite her previous beliefs, she had trouble adjusting without the omens of him, and believed it was a sign of something worse to come. (MM: "Anamnesis")